ok my last post of the year is gonna be short and sweet =)
2003 was a great year. thanks everyone who walked with me through it..
I LOVE YOU! *muack*
and if you're here illegally (i.e. i didn't tell you about my blog or you're not my friend)
haha..
happy new year all the same =)
and if you're a leftie
I LOVE YOU!
off to spend new year's eve with my babes!
oh and before i forget... mike wrote this spontaneously last night during our depressed & despondent icq conversation
so we are all neglected souls
waiting for someone to pick us up
with no where to turn to
but the internet
cold machines
empty hearts
unable to talk
to feel
like us
i loved it. it stirred up the deepest darkest feelings in me
i love melancholic shit like this
i love sprouters of this kinda melancholic shit as well.
last night. was floating away on a wonderful alcoholic cloud of baileys, gin, vodka and goodness knows what else in a living room heaven complete with dim lights live music billowing black curtains fake fireplace and four lovely angels with the names of joanne candice danette and mavis chattering around me. then came the three intruders into our lovely heaven who tried to chat the angels up. the ever so lovely and gracious angels obliged for a while then went off in search of more fun. =)
stumbling back to earth. i landed with a bump. got all the colour drained out of my face and almost lost my dinner but as usual my lovely angels were there for me =)
ok back to earth back to earth
the amazement and hysterics that follow when you discover that two of your friends have been obsessed with the SAME guy for the longest time you can ever imagine. lots of wide-eyed screaming and laughter as the sudden reality dawns on everyone. wahahahahaaa.. how funny how funny. so i and another angel lost our cool and composition and saintly auras for awhile. =)
was in this hysterically high mood just now and i'm just beginning to lose it so i'd better write everything down quickly. wahahahaaaa...
1st highlight of the day: watching some silly taiwanese variety show. oh my god the way it cracked me up. just couldn't stop laughing.... or maybe it was just the mood i was in. and the amazing thing was the utter lack of brains some taiwanese girls have. they randomly picked girls off the street and asked them questions like 'where are the pyramids found?' and ta-da! 0 out of 3 people got that right. one even went 'umm paris?'. i could have thrown a vase or something at her face on the screen. grrr.
2nd highlight: DANETTE'S MESSAGE!!!! it went something like
'why don't you stop playing GO FISH GO and GO out for dinner with us tomorrow?'
it got me rolling around in bed with laughter. i know... it doesn't seem funny to me anymore. dunno why it tickled me so either.. oh and to sidetrack a little. i found another great game! where you basically throw snowballs at elves and try not to get hit!
3rd highlight: TALKING TO LUKE!!!. oh baby... talking to u never fails to crack me up until i'm just a helpless ball of laughter. wahahahaaaaa.. don't forget all the devious schemes we thought up! waahahahaaaa you great crack-up cracked-up buddy!! -huge grin-
oooh and luke left me such a nice goodnight msg. awwwwwww...
"nitey nite gurl.
have a great time tmr!
date me when you have the time!
-- luke"
ok it isn't that wonderful.. but it's from my LUKE! =)
would lurve to date u but umm.. u know.. i AM attached and all that ya. so it's not that convenient. ya so hmm... some other time maybe?
but am real honoured and flattered that u asked dude..
wahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4th highlight: the 2 silly guys! ya umm so well there's this weihan who's sleeping in a certain eujin's room tonight (makes u wonder what they're up to huh.. -grin- ) and who were basically in the same room lah! so i was icq-ing weihan and talking to eujin on the phone simultaneously. and i and weihan were bitching a little about ej. who was trying to bitch to me (a little unsuccessfully) abt weihan. wahahahahaaaa... it was real funny.. while it lasted.
and weihan asked how i could manage to multitask (type and talk) so well. haha. didn't tell him that basically u don't really have to concentrate on the phone conversation. you just have to make appropriate noises after the other party's sentences. which works really well. they actually believe you're listening. hahaaaaa.
ok you all are probably going what the hell? but yah. do keep in mind that by this time i was already pretty high. and wasted.
and now that everything's over.. i feel drained. and wasted.
you realise that there is something seriously wrong with you (and possibly your level of intellect) when:
1. at 12:25 am you are sitting in front of the computer playing 'Go Fish Go'
2. it is a game found on Yahooligans (note: games for kids)
3. this game consists of trying to help a fish cross a busy highway to get back to its pond, and you have to try not to let it get ploughed down by the oncoming cars and trucks
4. the whoosh of the oncoming cars and the sound of truck horns get you really psyched up
5. you really really wish the fishie will reach its pond safely, but
6. you smack the table and cackle and hoot with laughter at the fishie's astonished and horrified expression upon being squished by some vehicle
7. you think this game is immensely exciting, even more so than the games more suited for people your age
8. your fishie has been crossing and crossing and re-crossing the same highway for the past 1 1/2 hours.
ohmygod i think i need to see a shrink
but before that lemme take fishie across one more time.
the last time.. i promise.
she plays without the music,
her eyes sometimes on her hands, sometimes closed
what she hears, what she imagines i do not know
there is no forced gravitas in her playing
it is a beauty beyond imagining -
clear, lovely, inexorable,
phrase across phrase, phrase echoing phrase, the incomplete, the unending Art of Fugue
it is an equal music
rain begins to fall. it strikes the skylight with a faint patter
after the eleventh contrapunctus is the interval
now will come the chaos:
the uncertain ordering of the pieces when i return -
and here, in the foyer, the chatter of gossip and praise.
i cannot hear any more.
i push through the crowded lobby into the rain.
i walk a long while, through the streets, the darkness of the park
once more i stand by the Serpentine
the rain has washed my earlier tears away
music, such music, is a sufficient gift
why ask for happiness; why hope not to grieve?
it is enough, it is to be blessed enough,
to live from day to day and to hear such music
--not too much, or the soul could not sustain it --
from time to time
___________________________________________________________
it once took me on an incredible emotional journey
i turn to it still, for comfort, for solace, and when i need a moment of tenderness
i found beauty in their broken love
and i found beauty in the music i played
my greatest joy would be to share it with you
for your feelings to follow the path that mine did
but i hold back
for i am afraid... just so very afraid
that it will fail to touch you the way it touched me
oh yah and all you lovely peeps out there.. tag me tag me!
and tell me what u all think of it =)
finally changed my blog template! something i've wanted to do for a long long time
took me the entire afternoon looking for a skin that i liked and quite frankly it was a tough decision coz so many of the skins just totally blew me away.. they were so incredibly beautiful
i absolutely love this one.. don't think i need to say why.
ohmygod gonna spend the next few hours just staring at my blog.
decided to stop cooping myself up in the house yesterday even though i was still feeling woozy and all and boy... that was the best decision i could have made! friends are the natural antidote for everything! one afternoon of hanging out and having fun with char fang and jo and i was feeling on top of the world again.. (er the wooziness came back once i got home but that's another story).
and regarding THAT. well guess i'm okay now. somehow you just get over it. but i know i'll never forget. it'll just be stored deep down somewhere where the memories of all the previous times you've hurt me exist..
oh btw he's sick as well. take care of yourself dear and please do wear warmer clothes! haha realizing that he's sick made me feel alot better and happier about myself being sick. but yes all of you esp char are gonna think i'm weird. and ya. but
oh well.
mona lisa's smile was not a bad show.. my dearest julia roberts & julia stiles were in it. haha of course i went a little crazy when the scene with julia roberts writing with her LEFT HAND came on.. started slapping fang's hand and squealing like some idiot but anyway... yup julia stiles was good too! remember first falling in love with her in 'save the last dance' which i, jen, shuzhen and esther skipped econs lect waaaay back in j2 to watch.
ok time for lunch time for lunch!!!
life's a bitch
and all i want to do now is scream and cry and ask WHY???!!!
it might be a very small matter to you
but your words hurt so much
am i even justified to feel this way?
or am i just being
whiny
demanding
jealous
possessive
i really don't know
i never thought it'd matter that much
but apparently it does
i'd never promised anyone anything... didn't dare to
coz i was waiting for your decision
i shouldn't have expected the same from you
no room for discussion..
you sealed the issue with that sentence
the finality of it all
it's not the consequences of your decision
that broke my heart
it's the way you came to that decision
as usual i'm going to keep it all inside
and pretend nothing's wrong
but it'll always suck to know that
i'm not as important to you as i thought i was...
this is dedicated to the girls in my life... who have shared so many good times with me.. and also importantly for being there for me when i'm down. for listening to me whine, complain and cry, for never failing to cheer me up, for slapping me back to my senses, for trying to make me laugh, for giving such good advice, for whining together with me, for telling me they'll help me scold / slap / beat up those who've made me upset and of course for always reminding me that they love me! in no particular order...
char candice ru jo fang mavis danette joanne & yuqing
i love u girls too! =)
haven't had so much fun in a long time and i guess to make up for that i'm feeling horribly horribly sick now. my nose won't stop spewing out icky green globs of stuff.. my throat feels like it's on fire.. my head's been hurting since god-knows-when and i really feel like i'm on my way to hell. don't think anyone can be capable of feeling any worse.
xmas dinner with the rg pple: am so glad i went! not having to pay a cent for my pork ribs (haha thanks jo!)... all the sinful deserts... the gift exchange. and the silly tim sum and jackpot games we played that almost brought the house down. haha have almost forgotten how rowdy we can get when a whole bunch of us are together and thank god we didn't get chased away from the restaurant. love all of you! 5 years and our friendship's still going strong... 3 cheers to us!
stayover at jo's place: another night of fun. gossip and eating and laughing at lynn... read mavis's blog for a detailed description.. haha and joanne's for the pics! =) candice and i the insomniacs ended up talking in a room full of sleeping (or so we thought) people about the 'daves of our lives' (yes i think that's a very apt title). oh yes and suddenly there are so many daves in my lives.. a grand total of 3 to be exact. and this is getting to be very exciting.. haha..
argh and i can't believe stupid mavis teo and wenshan heard every word of what we said!!!!!!!!!!!!
j1's training session: shall talk abt the happy stuff first. mavis and i actually outpaddled the j1's k2! yeah 3 cheers to us! umm but it was a different story when we each went down in a k1.. hmm.. quite embarrassing in fact.. couldn't even start bursting. hai yes a reflection of how grossly unfit and in need of training we are.
and the j1s: (girls mainly).. u all were disappointing. how do u expect to win anything with your current training attitude? 7 girls yesterday and it was the largest turnout all hols. The ac girls are actually quite strong this year and overconfidence will get you nowhere. being overconfident when your standard is not even there... how laughable. even jiao lian's worried. and you all seem like u can't be bothered. are you only going to wake up after getting thrashed at sdba??
and YOU. you know who u are. pretending not to hear jiao lian when he talks to you and not even bothering to look at him. really felt like giving you a tight slap in the face coz that's what you deserve.
bah.
-disgusted-
today (er actually yesterday since it's already 12:33 AM) was great.. hung out with jo and char at holland v doing nothing in particular.. as usual. but horror of horrors... we spent almost 2 hours in a BEAD SHOP!! exclaiming over stuff and generally acting silly and stupid and totally not our age. then ice cream at bellagio's which was great. great tasting gelato, great service, great company, great music, great ambiance. and i really don't understand why hardly anybody goes there.. i mean.. what more can u ask for in an ice cream parlour??
can foresee another night of tossing and turning and trying to fall asleep before daybreak and this time i really need sleep coz I'M GOING DOWN TO KALLANG TO PADDLE!! and i've got to wake up at bloody 8 something a.m. which is something i haven't done since contract paper almost a month ago.. mavis teo u'd better remember that wake up call!
yeah.. really looking forward to it. will get to see my beloved teammates again and my beloved k1. wonder if he's been missing me all this while. coz i have been thinking fondly of him from time to time. shall go give him a hug (and maybe a kiss) and hopefully take him down into the water. gonna do k2 with mavisteomiqi as well! ha mavis! remember the time we went down in a k2 a few days before nationals to try fooling the HCJC pple? guess it didn't really work huh.
i don't want to leave disappointed either. but i have a feeling i will. have not been hearing good things about the j1s' training attitude. shall go see it for myself tomorrow. but if joanne says so then it should be true. hai. hopefully someone will talk some sense into them REALLY SOON. argh. know i'll have lots of stuff to rant and rave about tomorrow when i'm back. and horrifyingly i realised... come 2004... we're gonna be J4s. oh man that's a scary thought.
really scary.
i absolutely hate it when people take it into their heads to decide what is good for me and tell me what i should do.
even if certain things or acts have their merits, it doesn't mean i have to do them
if i don't do something, that is obviously a choice i've made after having weighed the merits and demerits of this act
and that is a choice for me to make.. not anyone else.
unless of course if my decision has potentially disastrous effects... then yes.. i might grudgingly appreciate it if you give me a nudge in the correct direction
other than that.. please LEAVE ME ALONE.
and stop trying to change me just to fulfil your personal agendas.
thank you very much.
and that was the aquarian in me speaking. yep we aquarians value personal freedom a great deal and don't like being told what to do. yeah many people think horoscopes are basically a bunch of junk but this particular trait does stand out in almost all the aquarians i know.. so maybe there is some truth in horoscopes after all.
that was the horrible part of me speaking as well. i'm just a bundle of bad energy tonight.. all the negative feelings and emotions rolled into one. despondency... touchiness... blah. a part of me that i'm not proud of and that i try not to let surface too often..
can anyone actually be a jinx to an activity that is taking place thousands of kilometres away, in another continent and time zone? logic says definitely not. but doubts are starting to creep in.. soccer fans are reputed to be a superstitious lot but this is getting a little uncanny. we fail to win in practically every champs league match that i stay up to watch. we don't play well at the start... i switch off the tv and move away and ta-da! the match goes our way. this happens way too often. we were doing just fine tonight. i flip to that channel... and almost immediately the opponents score. i believe i'm a jinx.. yeah i know.. it's ridiculous, THIS coming from a (supposedly) educated person. but i'll continue to believe so until it's been proven otherwise.
ok this is gonna be a long post but i just wanna rant and rave
before i forget.. joanne: welcome back to singapore! =)
yes it is kinda weird to be living at home now when i've been 'away' for the past 3 months.. especially when i look out of the window at 1 or 2 am and see practically every unit of the neighbouring blocks in total darkness..then i have to mentally remind myself: "this is not raffles hall but a residential neighbourhood.. where people actually sleep at decent hours!" yeah.. takes some getting used to. and when i don't even feel remotely sleepy at 4am i just think... what's new. hah and my brother sleeps even later than i do! it's really funny to see my parents and grandma going into fits of despair at our weird sleeping habits.. they must think it's some sleeping disorder or something (and maybe it really is) but who cares... i love the night!
and today just further confirmed the fact that i suck at arcade games.. BIG TIME. bah. feel lousy.
cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed
What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
the one conclusion i have come to is that cynicism does indeed increase with age..and exposure to the Real World out there (however different that may be from the world we lived in as kids).
7th Heaven: i used to long for a family as perfect as that but over the years i started to feel more and more nauseated after watching each episode. what a pretty pink-cupcake-with-icing-on-top picture it painted. every family crisis would be solved with oh so sickly sweet i-love-you confessions, hugs, tears and kisses. if only the world revolved so simply. don't get me wrong, i believe in love more than i ever did..but there are other more subtle ways of showing it. this in-your-face thing ceases to work...after awhile. c'mon are you going to let little kids out there believe that life is a neverending fairy tale? and who should they blame if their lives are not as picture-perfect as that portrayed? their parents? themselves?
danielle steel: oh i know it's of common belief and opinion that her books are trash.. but enjoyable trash to me nevertheless.. in the Past but i kinda gave up on them over the years. just picked up one of her books recently and am finding it incredibly hard to get through it. again... everything is so sickly sweet. everyone absolutely adores everyone else, SHE always has such charm and wit and grace despite her young age. and yes don't forget those dazzling sapphire blue eyes. which makes me think: maybe i'm finally one step closer to comprehending the difference between popular fiction (trash most of the time) and true works of literature. but i guess writing these books to feed the masses does help propel oneself to the top of the "New York Times Bestseller List" and other charts like that. so i can't really blame her. maybe i should blame myself.. for growing up. afterall i once enjoyed her writing.. and dreamt along with the characters. but i guess it's time to move on.
and now i can't remember what got me onto this subject in the first place...
i scored 8120301 points in typershark! yippeee! ok maybe this score isn't fantastic but i've been trying to break the 8 million barrier since yesterday and i've done it! =) and the screen was so full that there was no more space for my 'lives' when i reached level 10! ...
haha ok. it sounds really sad that an online game can cause such drastic mood swings in me. my brother has heard all the expletives i've hurled at the monitor when the game didn't go my way...
and once again... danette seems to be the only one who can drag me out of my bored, lazy, i-can't-be-bothered-with-the-world mood. am meeting her for dinner tonight! although i'm broke with a capital B. come to think of it i should be going out soon.. wish dear i-am-back-from-my-hedonistic-lifestyle-in-london candice chiew could join us too but she's going out. somewhere. continuation of her london lifestyle probably. and mavis oh-so-scandalous-in-australia teo seems to have disappeared from the earth since she came back. argh..
ok yes... i do have to go soon..
but jo.. just wanna say take care & glad to be seeing u on sunday! and no matter what... you're still beautiful in my eyes, no matter how er.. smashed up u may look.. ok this is starting to sound a little lesbianic...
ok ok i shall go..
before i start saying something wrong...
in answer to everyone's questioning looks....
YES .. i'm THAT bored.
time started: 8:20 pm
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? yep.. if u count blogspot a journal
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? yeah.. with the voices in my head... haha.. and with my girl friends of course
MISSED SOMEONE? um.. yeah.. don't think i need to say who
HUGGED SOMEONE? er... a few days ago?..
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? not in a long long time =)
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? nope
PLAYED ANY GAMES ONLINE? now where shall i start? typershark, speed, lightning, antarctic adventure, flipwit, alchemy, rocketmania, collapse, yeah u all get the idea.
FEEL LONELY? not really..
I AM: me, myself and weiting
I WANT: to snap out of my bored mood!
I HAVE: such fantabulous people around me
I WISH: for world peace!!! *bimbotic giggle*
I HATE: people with no respect for others' beliefs and ideas
I MISS: the canoeing days! and the RG days as well
I FEAR: asphyxiation
I HEAR: some stupid jap song on tv.. the disgusting sonyericsson commercial
I SEARCH: for a better self
I WONDER: where i'll be 10 years from now
I REGRET: practically nothing i've done in my life
I LOVE: -you-
I ACHE: rarely now that i don't train
I ALWAYS: am happy... yes even when i'm bored
I AM NOT: all the bad things i hope i'm not
I DANCE: nope
I SING: to myself
I CRY: when my heart breaks
I AM NOT ALWAYS: bored
I WRITE: when my thoughts become too much for my head to contain
I WIN: when i overcome myself
I LOSE: when i succumb to dark temptations
I CONFUSE: over stuff i don't understand.. DUH..
I NEED: inner peace
I SHOULDA: learn not to demand so much of people
Yes Or No
x. You keep a diary: yep
x. You like to cook: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
x. You have a secret you have not shared with: yes
x. ""everybody has a secret..."" yes
x. You believe in love: yes
x. The Loudest Person you Know: ummm DANETTE??? (hrm i thot these were YES/NO qns?)
x. The Sexiest Person you Know: OLIVIER MARTINEZ! or KARL in love actually.. whatever his name is.
-----------------------------------------------
Do You...?
Have a(any) crush(es): no.. heh not currently..
Want to get married: hmm.. maybe..
Get motion Sickness: yeah on the bus in my jc days coz i spent most of my time in the sea..
Think you're a health freak: NEVER!!
Get along with your parents: most of the time
Like thunderstorms: love them!
NATURAL HAIR COLOR: black
CURRENT HAIR COLOR:black
BIRTHPLACE: singapore... but i like to dream otherwise
-----------------------------------
(FAVORITES )
NUMBER(S): 3, 9, 17
COLOR: purple & pink
DAY: er.. friday
MONTH: february!
CURRENT SONG: satellite by BT
FOOD: instant noodles
SEASON: autumn definitely
SPORT: canoeing? in a k1
DRINK: starbucks' expresso frappucino double shot
---------------------------------------
( PREFERENCES )
CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT : cuddle.. duh
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE?: hot chocolate
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE?: dark. definitely
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? vanilla!
----------------------------------------
note: this is the last 24 hours, not your life.
( IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU.... )
CRIED? nope
HELPED SOMEONE? hah. my brother to toast nuggets
BOUGHT SOMETHING? no..
GOTTEN SICK? no
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? no
TALKED TO AN EX? argh no ex.. as i said..
oh yeah.. that's it! haha =)
ok i realise it's been almost a week since i've blogged.. and in the past few days the thought of blogging has just filled me with utter boredom... simply because my life the past week has been one utter bore and i have absolutely nothing to write about. apart from the stayover at ru's place... james' baptism and gym duty and occasional ventures to orchard.. i've basically been one huge mass of inertia... too lazy even to reach for the remote control so that i spend most of my time slouched on the sofa staring at the blank tv screen and wondering if my brother will ever get his ass away from the computer.
hai but danette's post made me snap out of my hibernation and actually write something here.
and now i have something to declare:
i love you too danette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yep yep actually miss sharing a rm with u (surprisingly... haha!) and can't wait to move back... but i know that'll signify the start of your nightmare... *sniff*
and something that made me realise how quickly the days are flying by...
he'll be back home in 14 days! yeah it's been pushed forward by a day coz now he'll be back on the 31st.
which puts me in a dilemma now..
NEW YEAR'S EVE!
who do i spend it with...
him? but will he be too tired to go out with me? will he even want to spend it with me? .. and what will we do?
or them? but are they even doing anything?
or what? who? how????!!!!!!!
bleargh.
i should just stop worrying my ass off....
ooooh... so james is not the slacker i thought he was afterall! he actually got some of today's pics up on his journal! 2 ONLY to be exact but it's still better than none... =)
haha.. ok i shall keep my suan-ing and insults to a bare minimum..
here's one of the pics... with my beautiful legs on prominent display.. hahh...
dave called today!! was really really surprised coz he'd told me that there'd be no network in laos (but there apparently is in the city and they're only allowed to go there once a wk). was with the og having lunch in bedok when he called.. it was very noisy in the background and the conversation was a little disjointed and we only talked for awhile but it was great hearing from him! and his voice saying the familiar "hey guess who?" when i picked up. haah.. they were commenting on how happy i looked after that and yeah the call really brightened my day =)
despite the dreary weather
we went to ubin to cycle despite lots of stops and procrastination along the way but yeah we got there in the end.. cycled in the rain and sloshed thru mud but had lotsa fun =) feels like the canoeing days when just walked around in wet clothes waiting to be dryed out.. james the photo addict was snapping away most of the time.. heh.. can't wait for him to put them up on his livejournal for me to leech from! so ya =)
anyway the rain did me good... but had to wash so many things when i came back..
sandals.. bag.. wallet..
but now i'm nice and warm and comfortable... ready for bed!
22 days till he's back..
hope you're having a blast there!
blogger was down last night! just when i had so many things to write about =(
basically these two days have been filled with good sinful food =) jap food at PS, then chocolate milkshake, stingray (with lots of chilli!) and rosti at Marche. and it was all a treat! then hanging out at lips cafe today with jo and danette (what happened to the rest of the team?!?!) and having pasta and what can be counted as the BEST mudpie i've ever tasted!
oh yes and hanzhong owes me a milkshake. haha. coz both of us played this dumb game walking around taka while he was waiting for his mum and i was waiting for 7pm to come.. hmm.. so we were each supposed to find a cute guy / girl (him / me) respectively to show the other party... and the first to spot one would get a treat! and duh. of course I won... coz there are a damn hell lot more good looking girls than guys in singapore. it was really funny... both of us staring intently at all the passerbys and peering at people in shops and cafes... and occasionally nudging each other and pointing out suitable candidates. haha. probably one of the lamest things i've ever done in my life.. but really enjoyed it =)
spent today afternoon with part of the og... me, celeste, pc, willy & hz.. at.. HCJC! haha yup pc and celeste were showing us around the place... quite a nice windy quiet enviroment actually and we ended up sprawling around on the class benches and talking... about stuff in general. what a great way to spend a lazy holiday afternoon =)
oh and my wish list just got longer!
7) project shop sling bag
8) miss selfridge long sleeved top
9) BLV Blu
10) Thierry Mugler's 'Angel'
hmmmmm....
those of you who haven't caught Love Actually yet... go catch it! it's seriously one of the best movies i've seen in a long time (not like i've watched alot anyway)... but it's really heartwarming, so unlike all the typical cliche love stories flying about everywhere. even teared at several parts and yup.. what with christmas coming and all... so ya =) catch it with a loved one! hai. this movie was a treat from eujin too but... i know both of us would have rather watched it with different pple... him with his *ahem* whoever... and me with -him- of course. oooh... and did i mention this really drop dead gorgeous guy who plays carl... or is it karl. whatever. yup just look out for him! woohoo..
he's the olivier martinez kind... wow.. is he hot or what.
argh.. anyway the movie got me thinking...
again..
think i've just been numbing myself... to my emotions... to whatever's going on around me. sometimes it's better not to let yourself feel if you know the rush of emotions that would come otherwise.
been thinking about us..
was it fate that brought us together?
sometimes just one little action can just change your life forever...
i've often asked him: what would've happened if i hadn't stayed over that night? where would we be now? what would we mean to each other? how different would our lives have been over the past few months?
and to be honest... i really don't know.
he's become such a big part of my life that i can't ever imagine not talking to him everyday, or knowing that he'll be there for me and i for him.. and knowing that i can tell him anything on my mind.
well... really glad i did what i did. no regrets =)
hai so all of you (three) people out there agonizing over what you should do about the people you like ... YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! haha.. just do what you want to! don't get bogged down by worries about how the other party will react or about feeling vulnerable or whatever.. u never know.. one little action or a few words could change your life forever. even if nothing happens.. you're still back at square one.. but at least you know you DID something and won't look back with regrets.................
think i'm falling sick... for the 1st time in 1yr 10months... about time actually.. haha. feeling hot and cold and having a headache. sigh. gonna sleep.. and hopefully i'll feel better tmr morn.
just came back from a huge shopping spree! and i really have to thank danette for this... for getting my whiny ass out of the house.. but shopping today with her was good.. and the long gossip session we had at the 2 mosburgers we visited.
now i've this whole long shopping wish list...
1) black stussy skirt
2) white top
3) peach nike long sleeved top
4) fcuk tshirt
5) elle tshirt
6) nautica / future state jeans
yikes yikes yikes... lots of stuff to get.. but at least it's alot better than danette's $139 skirt!
yay gonna visit yating at work at carrefour someday!
really addicted to online games now.. speed.. diamond mine.. lightning.. flipwit.. crazy coins.. minesweeper.. typershark.. argh u name it i've played it. sometimes i just want to stay infront of the computer the whole day and not go out. this is bad..... stopstopstopstop it!!!!
my post today sounds really disjointed.
-disgusted-
and my french sucks now... had to rush all the way into the room to check my dictionary to find out how to say 'guilty' in french. this is bad..
-really very disgusted now-
anyways.. was gossiping about the hall people just now with danette... and i realise i do miss hall life quite abit actually.. yep.. and the pple too..
icq-ing yating now...
and eujin's gonna call later..
yippee.. seems like eons since i've last talked to them
=)
it's saturday now...
so.. 26 days to go!
i really don't know which is worse... going to school for lessons everyday and having tons of work to do or being stuck at home with absolutely nothing to do at all during the hols. i'm driving myself crazy!!! all i do nowadays is wake up... use the comp.. eat... sleep.. watch tv... read... go out... talk on the phone... go for a run sometimes... it's so mind numbing and it's hard to believe that exams ended just 8 days ago. it seems like ages since i last touched a pen..
thank god for road race training and the occasional o-team meeting though.. there would be absolutely NOTHING to do otherwise..
had a bout of insomnia last night after my great whining session on the phone with ru.. or maybe it wasn't insomnia. anyway at 2 a.m. i was still tossing and turning around in bed.. getting all hot and cold and alternatively throwing the covers off me and pulling them back over me again. guess i did fall into some sort of restless sleep after that... but somehow i felt really fresh upon opening my eyes at 7a.m. sometimes i really think our body clocks are really powerful... mine knowing that something big would be happening this morning and i was instantly alert at that early hour.
oh wells. anyway. he's gone. have a great trip dear.
27 days to go..
and now i can't help thinking how i could.. on this very day.. be flying to sydney... argh stop thinking.. stop stop stop..
feel really great after a run in the rain! =) started running with the sky dark and it began to drizzle along the way. loved the drizzle... while it lasted but then it started to pour heavily and all the traffic lights turned red the exact moment i reached the junction and tried to cross! argh.. but it was fun while it lasted
went out with the og yesterday. funny... after 3 great months of knowing each other yesterday was the 1st time we actually went out as a group... our 1st planned outing together... haha... but even then.. SOME people weren't around. coffee at citylink... walking to the esplanade... taking lomos with james' camera... popcorn and candy floss... walking down the beach so that mike could look at the scandalous stuff going on... dinner at pasta mania... and finally... highlight of the day... mike's new hairdo! wow he looks great man with his new haircut (at the 10 min $10 place) and his DIY spiked hair (thanks to james) with hair wax from watson's (our xmas prezzie for him!).
heh. anyway... dinner's calling.. off to fill my stomach!
candice
danette
danielle
diana
fang
hanshuo
james
jieyun
joanne
mavis
melissa
ru
shan
sharon
sylvia
xiuling
xiuying
ok my last post of the year is gonna be short and sweet =)
2003 was a great year. thanks everyone who walked with me through it..
I LOVE YOU! *muack*
and if you're here illegally (i.e. i didn't tell you about my blog or you're not my friend)
haha..
happy new year all the same =)
and if you're a leftie
I LOVE YOU!
off to spend new year's eve with my babes!
oh and before i forget... mike wrote this spontaneously last night during our depressed & despondent icq conversation
so we are all neglected souls
waiting for someone to pick us up
with no where to turn to
but the internet
cold machines
empty hearts
unable to talk
to feel
like us
i loved it. it stirred up the deepest darkest feelings in me
i love melancholic shit like this
i love sprouters of this kinda melancholic shit as well.
last night. was floating away on a wonderful alcoholic cloud of baileys, gin, vodka and goodness knows what else in a living room heaven complete with dim lights live music billowing black curtains fake fireplace and four lovely angels with the names of joanne candice danette and mavis chattering around me. then came the three intruders into our lovely heaven who tried to chat the angels up. the ever so lovely and gracious angels obliged for a while then went off in search of more fun. =)
stumbling back to earth. i landed with a bump. got all the colour drained out of my face and almost lost my dinner but as usual my lovely angels were there for me =)
ok back to earth back to earth
the amazement and hysterics that follow when you discover that two of your friends have been obsessed with the SAME guy for the longest time you can ever imagine. lots of wide-eyed screaming and laughter as the sudden reality dawns on everyone. wahahahahaaa.. how funny how funny. so i and another angel lost our cool and composition and saintly auras for awhile. =)
was in this hysterically high mood just now and i'm just beginning to lose it so i'd better write everything down quickly. wahahahaaaa...
1st highlight of the day: watching some silly taiwanese variety show. oh my god the way it cracked me up. just couldn't stop laughing.... or maybe it was just the mood i was in. and the amazing thing was the utter lack of brains some taiwanese girls have. they randomly picked girls off the street and asked them questions like 'where are the pyramids found?' and ta-da! 0 out of 3 people got that right. one even went 'umm paris?'. i could have thrown a vase or something at her face on the screen. grrr.
2nd highlight: DANETTE'S MESSAGE!!!! it went something like
'why don't you stop playing GO FISH GO and GO out for dinner with us tomorrow?'
it got me rolling around in bed with laughter. i know... it doesn't seem funny to me anymore. dunno why it tickled me so either.. oh and to sidetrack a little. i found another great game! where you basically throw snowballs at elves and try not to get hit!
3rd highlight: TALKING TO LUKE!!!. oh baby... talking to u never fails to crack me up until i'm just a helpless ball of laughter. wahahahaaaaa.. don't forget all the devious schemes we thought up! waahahahaaaa you great crack-up cracked-up buddy!! -huge grin-
oooh and luke left me such a nice goodnight msg. awwwwwww...
"nitey nite gurl.
have a great time tmr!
date me when you have the time!
-- luke"
ok it isn't that wonderful.. but it's from my LUKE! =)
would lurve to date u but umm.. u know.. i AM attached and all that ya. so it's not that convenient. ya so hmm... some other time maybe?
but am real honoured and flattered that u asked dude..
wahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4th highlight: the 2 silly guys! ya umm so well there's this weihan who's sleeping in a certain eujin's room tonight (makes u wonder what they're up to huh.. -grin- ) and who were basically in the same room lah! so i was icq-ing weihan and talking to eujin on the phone simultaneously. and i and weihan were bitching a little about ej. who was trying to bitch to me (a little unsuccessfully) abt weihan. wahahahahaaaa... it was real funny.. while it lasted.
and weihan asked how i could manage to multitask (type and talk) so well. haha. didn't tell him that basically u don't really have to concentrate on the phone conversation. you just have to make appropriate noises after the other party's sentences. which works really well. they actually believe you're listening. hahaaaaa.
ok you all are probably going what the hell? but yah. do keep in mind that by this time i was already pretty high. and wasted.
and now that everything's over.. i feel drained. and wasted.
you realise that there is something seriously wrong with you (and possibly your level of intellect) when:
1. at 12:25 am you are sitting in front of the computer playing 'Go Fish Go'
2. it is a game found on Yahooligans (note: games for kids)
3. this game consists of trying to help a fish cross a busy highway to get back to its pond, and you have to try not to let it get ploughed down by the oncoming cars and trucks
4. the whoosh of the oncoming cars and the sound of truck horns get you really psyched up
5. you really really wish the fishie will reach its pond safely, but
6. you smack the table and cackle and hoot with laughter at the fishie's astonished and horrified expression upon being squished by some vehicle
7. you think this game is immensely exciting, even more so than the games more suited for people your age
8. your fishie has been crossing and crossing and re-crossing the same highway for the past 1 1/2 hours.
ohmygod i think i need to see a shrink
but before that lemme take fishie across one more time.
the last time.. i promise.
she plays without the music,
her eyes sometimes on her hands, sometimes closed
what she hears, what she imagines i do not know
there is no forced gravitas in her playing
it is a beauty beyond imagining -
clear, lovely, inexorable,
phrase across phrase, phrase echoing phrase, the incomplete, the unending Art of Fugue
it is an equal music
rain begins to fall. it strikes the skylight with a faint patter
after the eleventh contrapunctus is the interval
now will come the chaos:
the uncertain ordering of the pieces when i return -
and here, in the foyer, the chatter of gossip and praise.
i cannot hear any more.
i push through the crowded lobby into the rain.
i walk a long while, through the streets, the darkness of the park
once more i stand by the Serpentine
the rain has washed my earlier tears away
music, such music, is a sufficient gift
why ask for happiness; why hope not to grieve?
it is enough, it is to be blessed enough,
to live from day to day and to hear such music
--not too much, or the soul could not sustain it --
from time to time
___________________________________________________________
it once took me on an incredible emotional journey
i turn to it still, for comfort, for solace, and when i need a moment of tenderness
i found beauty in their broken love
and i found beauty in the music i played
my greatest joy would be to share it with you
for your feelings to follow the path that mine did
but i hold back
for i am afraid... just so very afraid
that it will fail to touch you the way it touched me
oh yah and all you lovely peeps out there.. tag me tag me!
and tell me what u all think of it =)
finally changed my blog template! something i've wanted to do for a long long time
took me the entire afternoon looking for a skin that i liked and quite frankly it was a tough decision coz so many of the skins just totally blew me away.. they were so incredibly beautiful
i absolutely love this one.. don't think i need to say why.
ohmygod gonna spend the next few hours just staring at my blog.
decided to stop cooping myself up in the house yesterday even though i was still feeling woozy and all and boy... that was the best decision i could have made! friends are the natural antidote for everything! one afternoon of hanging out and having fun with char fang and jo and i was feeling on top of the world again.. (er the wooziness came back once i got home but that's another story).
and regarding THAT. well guess i'm okay now. somehow you just get over it. but i know i'll never forget. it'll just be stored deep down somewhere where the memories of all the previous times you've hurt me exist..
oh btw he's sick as well. take care of yourself dear and please do wear warmer clothes! haha realizing that he's sick made me feel alot better and happier about myself being sick. but yes all of you esp char are gonna think i'm weird. and ya. but
oh well.
mona lisa's smile was not a bad show.. my dearest julia roberts & julia stiles were in it. haha of course i went a little crazy when the scene with julia roberts writing with her LEFT HAND came on.. started slapping fang's hand and squealing like some idiot but anyway... yup julia stiles was good too! remember first falling in love with her in 'save the last dance' which i, jen, shuzhen and esther skipped econs lect waaaay back in j2 to watch.
ok time for lunch time for lunch!!!
life's a bitch
and all i want to do now is scream and cry and ask WHY???!!!
it might be a very small matter to you
but your words hurt so much
am i even justified to feel this way?
or am i just being
whiny
demanding
jealous
possessive
i really don't know
i never thought it'd matter that much
but apparently it does
i'd never promised anyone anything... didn't dare to
coz i was waiting for your decision
i shouldn't have expected the same from you
no room for discussion..
you sealed the issue with that sentence
the finality of it all
it's not the consequences of your decision
that broke my heart
it's the way you came to that decision
as usual i'm going to keep it all inside
and pretend nothing's wrong
but it'll always suck to know that
i'm not as important to you as i thought i was...
this is dedicated to the girls in my life... who have shared so many good times with me.. and also importantly for being there for me when i'm down. for listening to me whine, complain and cry, for never failing to cheer me up, for slapping me back to my senses, for trying to make me laugh, for giving such good advice, for whining together with me, for telling me they'll help me scold / slap / beat up those who've made me upset and of course for always reminding me that they love me! in no particular order...
char candice ru jo fang mavis danette joanne & yuqing
i love u girls too! =)
haven't had so much fun in a long time and i guess to make up for that i'm feeling horribly horribly sick now. my nose won't stop spewing out icky green globs of stuff.. my throat feels like it's on fire.. my head's been hurting since god-knows-when and i really feel like i'm on my way to hell. don't think anyone can be capable of feeling any worse.
xmas dinner with the rg pple: am so glad i went! not having to pay a cent for my pork ribs (haha thanks jo!)... all the sinful deserts... the gift exchange. and the silly tim sum and jackpot games we played that almost brought the house down. haha have almost forgotten how rowdy we can get when a whole bunch of us are together and thank god we didn't get chased away from the restaurant. love all of you! 5 years and our friendship's still going strong... 3 cheers to us!
stayover at jo's place: another night of fun. gossip and eating and laughing at lynn... read mavis's blog for a detailed description.. haha and joanne's for the pics! =) candice and i the insomniacs ended up talking in a room full of sleeping (or so we thought) people about the 'daves of our lives' (yes i think that's a very apt title). oh yes and suddenly there are so many daves in my lives.. a grand total of 3 to be exact. and this is getting to be very exciting.. haha..
argh and i can't believe stupid mavis teo and wenshan heard every word of what we said!!!!!!!!!!!!
j1's training session: shall talk abt the happy stuff first. mavis and i actually outpaddled the j1's k2! yeah 3 cheers to us! umm but it was a different story when we each went down in a k1.. hmm.. quite embarrassing in fact.. couldn't even start bursting. hai yes a reflection of how grossly unfit and in need of training we are.
and the j1s: (girls mainly).. u all were disappointing. how do u expect to win anything with your current training attitude? 7 girls yesterday and it was the largest turnout all hols. The ac girls are actually quite strong this year and overconfidence will get you nowhere. being overconfident when your standard is not even there... how laughable. even jiao lian's worried. and you all seem like u can't be bothered. are you only going to wake up after getting thrashed at sdba??
and YOU. you know who u are. pretending not to hear jiao lian when he talks to you and not even bothering to look at him. really felt like giving you a tight slap in the face coz that's what you deserve.
bah.
-disgusted-
today (er actually yesterday since it's already 12:33 AM) was great.. hung out with jo and char at holland v doing nothing in particular.. as usual. but horror of horrors... we spent almost 2 hours in a BEAD SHOP!! exclaiming over stuff and generally acting silly and stupid and totally not our age. then ice cream at bellagio's which was great. great tasting gelato, great service, great company, great music, great ambiance. and i really don't understand why hardly anybody goes there.. i mean.. what more can u ask for in an ice cream parlour??
can foresee another night of tossing and turning and trying to fall asleep before daybreak and this time i really need sleep coz I'M GOING DOWN TO KALLANG TO PADDLE!! and i've got to wake up at bloody 8 something a.m. which is something i haven't done since contract paper almost a month ago.. mavis teo u'd better remember that wake up call!
yeah.. really looking forward to it. will get to see my beloved teammates again and my beloved k1. wonder if he's been missing me all this while. coz i have been thinking fondly of him from time to time. shall go give him a hug (and maybe a kiss) and hopefully take him down into the water. gonna do k2 with mavisteomiqi as well! ha mavis! remember the time we went down in a k2 a few days before nationals to try fooling the HCJC pple? guess it didn't really work huh.
i don't want to leave disappointed either. but i have a feeling i will. have not been hearing good things about the j1s' training attitude. shall go see it for myself tomorrow. but if joanne says so then it should be true. hai. hopefully someone will talk some sense into them REALLY SOON. argh. know i'll have lots of stuff to rant and rave about tomorrow when i'm back. and horrifyingly i realised... come 2004... we're gonna be J4s. oh man that's a scary thought.
really scary.
i absolutely hate it when people take it into their heads to decide what is good for me and tell me what i should do.
even if certain things or acts have their merits, it doesn't mean i have to do them
if i don't do something, that is obviously a choice i've made after having weighed the merits and demerits of this act
and that is a choice for me to make.. not anyone else.
unless of course if my decision has potentially disastrous effects... then yes.. i might grudgingly appreciate it if you give me a nudge in the correct direction
other than that.. please LEAVE ME ALONE.
and stop trying to change me just to fulfil your personal agendas.
thank you very much.
and that was the aquarian in me speaking. yep we aquarians value personal freedom a great deal and don't like being told what to do. yeah many people think horoscopes are basically a bunch of junk but this particular trait does stand out in almost all the aquarians i know.. so maybe there is some truth in horoscopes after all.
that was the horrible part of me speaking as well. i'm just a bundle of bad energy tonight.. all the negative feelings and emotions rolled into one. despondency... touchiness... blah. a part of me that i'm not proud of and that i try not to let surface too often..
can anyone actually be a jinx to an activity that is taking place thousands of kilometres away, in another continent and time zone? logic says definitely not. but doubts are starting to creep in.. soccer fans are reputed to be a superstitious lot but this is getting a little uncanny. we fail to win in practically every champs league match that i stay up to watch. we don't play well at the start... i switch off the tv and move away and ta-da! the match goes our way. this happens way too often. we were doing just fine tonight. i flip to that channel... and almost immediately the opponents score. i believe i'm a jinx.. yeah i know.. it's ridiculous, THIS coming from a (supposedly) educated person. but i'll continue to believe so until it's been proven otherwise.
ok this is gonna be a long post but i just wanna rant and rave
before i forget.. joanne: welcome back to singapore! =)
yes it is kinda weird to be living at home now when i've been 'away' for the past 3 months.. especially when i look out of the window at 1 or 2 am and see practically every unit of the neighbouring blocks in total darkness..then i have to mentally remind myself: "this is not raffles hall but a residential neighbourhood.. where people actually sleep at decent hours!" yeah.. takes some getting used to. and when i don't even feel remotely sleepy at 4am i just think... what's new. hah and my brother sleeps even later than i do! it's really funny to see my parents and grandma going into fits of despair at our weird sleeping habits.. they must think it's some sleeping disorder or something (and maybe it really is) but who cares... i love the night!
and today just further confirmed the fact that i suck at arcade games.. BIG TIME. bah. feel lousy.
cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed
What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
the one conclusion i have come to is that cynicism does indeed increase with age..and exposure to the Real World out there (however different that may be from the world we lived in as kids).
7th Heaven: i used to long for a family as perfect as that but over the years i started to feel more and more nauseated after watching each episode. what a pretty pink-cupcake-with-icing-on-top picture it painted. every family crisis would be solved with oh so sickly sweet i-love-you confessions, hugs, tears and kisses. if only the world revolved so simply. don't get me wrong, i believe in love more than i ever did..but there are other more subtle ways of showing it. this in-your-face thing ceases to work...after awhile. c'mon are you going to let little kids out there believe that life is a neverending fairy tale? and who should they blame if their lives are not as picture-perfect as that portrayed? their parents? themselves?
danielle steel: oh i know it's of common belief and opinion that her books are trash.. but enjoyable trash to me nevertheless.. in the Past but i kinda gave up on them over the years. just picked up one of her books recently and am finding it incredibly hard to get through it. again... everything is so sickly sweet. everyone absolutely adores everyone else, SHE always has such charm and wit and grace despite her young age. and yes don't forget those dazzling sapphire blue eyes. which makes me think: maybe i'm finally one step closer to comprehending the difference between popular fiction (trash most of the time) and true works of literature. but i guess writing these books to feed the masses does help propel oneself to the top of the "New York Times Bestseller List" and other charts like that. so i can't really blame her. maybe i should blame myself.. for growing up. afterall i once enjoyed her writing.. and dreamt along with the characters. but i guess it's time to move on.
and now i can't remember what got me onto this subject in the first place...
i scored 8120301 points in typershark! yippeee! ok maybe this score isn't fantastic but i've been trying to break the 8 million barrier since yesterday and i've done it! =) and the screen was so full that there was no more space for my 'lives' when i reached level 10! ...
haha ok. it sounds really sad that an online game can cause such drastic mood swings in me. my brother has heard all the expletives i've hurled at the monitor when the game didn't go my way...
and once again... danette seems to be the only one who can drag me out of my bored, lazy, i-can't-be-bothered-with-the-world mood. am meeting her for dinner tonight! although i'm broke with a capital B. come to think of it i should be going out soon.. wish dear i-am-back-from-my-hedonistic-lifestyle-in-london candice chiew could join us too but she's going out. somewhere. continuation of her london lifestyle probably. and mavis oh-so-scandalous-in-australia teo seems to have disappeared from the earth since she came back. argh..
ok yes... i do have to go soon..
but jo.. just wanna say take care & glad to be seeing u on sunday! and no matter what... you're still beautiful in my eyes, no matter how er.. smashed up u may look.. ok this is starting to sound a little lesbianic...
ok ok i shall go..
before i start saying something wrong...
in answer to everyone's questioning looks....
YES .. i'm THAT bored.
time started: 8:20 pm
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? yep.. if u count blogspot a journal
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? yeah.. with the voices in my head... haha.. and with my girl friends of course
MISSED SOMEONE? um.. yeah.. don't think i need to say who
HUGGED SOMEONE? er... a few days ago?..
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? not in a long long time =)
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? nope
PLAYED ANY GAMES ONLINE? now where shall i start? typershark, speed, lightning, antarctic adventure, flipwit, alchemy, rocketmania, collapse, yeah u all get the idea.
FEEL LONELY? not really..
I AM: me, myself and weiting
I WANT: to snap out of my bored mood!
I HAVE: such fantabulous people around me
I WISH: for world peace!!! *bimbotic giggle*
I HATE: people with no respect for others' beliefs and ideas
I MISS: the canoeing days! and the RG days as well
I FEAR: asphyxiation
I HEAR: some stupid jap song on tv.. the disgusting sonyericsson commercial
I SEARCH: for a better self
I WONDER: where i'll be 10 years from now
I REGRET: practically nothing i've done in my life
I LOVE: -you-
I ACHE: rarely now that i don't train
I ALWAYS: am happy... yes even when i'm bored
I AM NOT: all the bad things i hope i'm not
I DANCE: nope
I SING: to myself
I CRY: when my heart breaks
I AM NOT ALWAYS: bored
I WRITE: when my thoughts become too much for my head to contain
I WIN: when i overcome myself
I LOSE: when i succumb to dark temptations
I CONFUSE: over stuff i don't understand.. DUH..
I NEED: inner peace
I SHOULDA: learn not to demand so much of people
Yes Or No
x. You keep a diary: yep
x. You like to cook: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
x. You have a secret you have not shared with: yes
x. ""everybody has a secret..."" yes
x. You believe in love: yes
x. The Loudest Person you Know: ummm DANETTE??? (hrm i thot these were YES/NO qns?)
x. The Sexiest Person you Know: OLIVIER MARTINEZ! or KARL in love actually.. whatever his name is.
-----------------------------------------------
Do You...?
Have a(any) crush(es): no.. heh not currently..
Want to get married: hmm.. maybe..
Get motion Sickness: yeah on the bus in my jc days coz i spent most of my time in the sea..
Think you're a health freak: NEVER!!
Get along with your parents: most of the time
Like thunderstorms: love them!
NATURAL HAIR COLOR: black
CURRENT HAIR COLOR:black
BIRTHPLACE: singapore... but i like to dream otherwise
-----------------------------------
(FAVORITES )
NUMBER(S): 3, 9, 17
COLOR: purple & pink
DAY: er.. friday
MONTH: february!
CURRENT SONG: satellite by BT
FOOD: instant noodles
SEASON: autumn definitely
SPORT: canoeing? in a k1
DRINK: starbucks' expresso frappucino double shot
---------------------------------------
( PREFERENCES )
CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT : cuddle.. duh
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE?: hot chocolate
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE?: dark. definitely
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? vanilla!
----------------------------------------
note: this is the last 24 hours, not your life.
( IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU.... )
CRIED? nope
HELPED SOMEONE? hah. my brother to toast nuggets
BOUGHT SOMETHING? no..
GOTTEN SICK? no
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? no
TALKED TO AN EX? argh no ex.. as i said..
oh yeah.. that's it! haha =)
ok i realise it's been almost a week since i've blogged.. and in the past few days the thought of blogging has just filled me with utter boredom... simply because my life the past week has been one utter bore and i have absolutely nothing to write about. apart from the stayover at ru's place... james' baptism and gym duty and occasional ventures to orchard.. i've basically been one huge mass of inertia... too lazy even to reach for the remote control so that i spend most of my time slouched on the sofa staring at the blank tv screen and wondering if my brother will ever get his ass away from the computer.
hai but danette's post made me snap out of my hibernation and actually write something here.
and now i have something to declare:
i love you too danette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yep yep actually miss sharing a rm with u (surprisingly... haha!) and can't wait to move back... but i know that'll signify the start of your nightmare... *sniff*
and something that made me realise how quickly the days are flying by...
he'll be back home in 14 days! yeah it's been pushed forward by a day coz now he'll be back on the 31st.
which puts me in a dilemma now..
NEW YEAR'S EVE!
who do i spend it with...
him? but will he be too tired to go out with me? will he even want to spend it with me? .. and what will we do?
or them? but are they even doing anything?
or what? who? how????!!!!!!!
bleargh.
i should just stop worrying my ass off....
ooooh... so james is not the slacker i thought he was afterall! he actually got some of today's pics up on his journal! 2 ONLY to be exact but it's still better than none... =)
haha.. ok i shall keep my suan-ing and insults to a bare minimum..
here's one of the pics... with my beautiful legs on prominent display.. hahh...
dave called today!! was really really surprised coz he'd told me that there'd be no network in laos (but there apparently is in the city and they're only allowed to go there once a wk). was with the og having lunch in bedok when he called.. it was very noisy in the background and the conversation was a little disjointed and we only talked for awhile but it was great hearing from him! and his voice saying the familiar "hey guess who?" when i picked up. haah.. they were commenting on how happy i looked after that and yeah the call really brightened my day =)
despite the dreary weather
we went to ubin to cycle despite lots of stops and procrastination along the way but yeah we got there in the end.. cycled in the rain and sloshed thru mud but had lotsa fun =) feels like the canoeing days when just walked around in wet clothes waiting to be dryed out.. james the photo addict was snapping away most of the time.. heh.. can't wait for him to put them up on his livejournal for me to leech from! so ya =)
anyway the rain did me good... but had to wash so many things when i came back..
sandals.. bag.. wallet..
but now i'm nice and warm and comfortable... ready for bed!
22 days till he's back..
hope you're having a blast there!
blogger was down last night! just when i had so many things to write about =(
basically these two days have been filled with good sinful food =) jap food at PS, then chocolate milkshake, stingray (with lots of chilli!) and rosti at Marche. and it was all a treat! then hanging out at lips cafe today with jo and danette (what happened to the rest of the team?!?!) and having pasta and what can be counted as the BEST mudpie i've ever tasted!
oh yes and hanzhong owes me a milkshake. haha. coz both of us played this dumb game walking around taka while he was waiting for his mum and i was waiting for 7pm to come.. hmm.. so we were each supposed to find a cute guy / girl (him / me) respectively to show the other party... and the first to spot one would get a treat! and duh. of course I won... coz there are a damn hell lot more good looking girls than guys in singapore. it was really funny... both of us staring intently at all the passerbys and peering at people in shops and cafes... and occasionally nudging each other and pointing out suitable candidates. haha. probably one of the lamest things i've ever done in my life.. but really enjoyed it =)
spent today afternoon with part of the og... me, celeste, pc, willy & hz.. at.. HCJC! haha yup pc and celeste were showing us around the place... quite a nice windy quiet enviroment actually and we ended up sprawling around on the class benches and talking... about stuff in general. what a great way to spend a lazy holiday afternoon =)
oh and my wish list just got longer!
7) project shop sling bag
8) miss selfridge long sleeved top
9) BLV Blu
10) Thierry Mugler's 'Angel'
hmmmmm....
those of you who haven't caught Love Actually yet... go catch it! it's seriously one of the best movies i've seen in a long time (not like i've watched alot anyway)... but it's really heartwarming, so unlike all the typical cliche love stories flying about everywhere. even teared at several parts and yup.. what with christmas coming and all... so ya =) catch it with a loved one! hai. this movie was a treat from eujin too but... i know both of us would have rather watched it with different pple... him with his *ahem* whoever... and me with -him- of course. oooh... and did i mention this really drop dead gorgeous guy who plays carl... or is it karl. whatever. yup just look out for him! woohoo..
he's the olivier martinez kind... wow.. is he hot or what.
argh.. anyway the movie got me thinking...
again..
think i've just been numbing myself... to my emotions... to whatever's going on around me. sometimes it's better not to let yourself feel if you know the rush of emotions that would come otherwise.
been thinking about us..
was it fate that brought us together?
sometimes just one little action can just change your life forever...
i've often asked him: what would've happened if i hadn't stayed over that night? where would we be now? what would we mean to each other? how different would our lives have been over the past few months?
and to be honest... i really don't know.
he's become such a big part of my life that i can't ever imagine not talking to him everyday, or knowing that he'll be there for me and i for him.. and knowing that i can tell him anything on my mind.
well... really glad i did what i did. no regrets =)
hai so all of you (three) people out there agonizing over what you should do about the people you like ... YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! haha.. just do what you want to! don't get bogged down by worries about how the other party will react or about feeling vulnerable or whatever.. u never know.. one little action or a few words could change your life forever. even if nothing happens.. you're still back at square one.. but at least you know you DID something and won't look back with regrets.................
think i'm falling sick... for the 1st time in 1yr 10months... about time actually.. haha. feeling hot and cold and having a headache. sigh. gonna sleep.. and hopefully i'll feel better tmr morn.
just came back from a huge shopping spree! and i really have to thank danette for this... for getting my whiny ass out of the house.. but shopping today with her was good.. and the long gossip session we had at the 2 mosburgers we visited.
now i've this whole long shopping wish list...
1) black stussy skirt
2) white top
3) peach nike long sleeved top
4) fcuk tshirt
5) elle tshirt
6) nautica / future state jeans
yikes yikes yikes... lots of stuff to get.. but at least it's alot better than danette's $139 skirt!
yay gonna visit yating at work at carrefour someday!
really addicted to online games now.. speed.. diamond mine.. lightning.. flipwit.. crazy coins.. minesweeper.. typershark.. argh u name it i've played it. sometimes i just want to stay infront of the computer the whole day and not go out. this is bad..... stopstopstopstop it!!!!
my post today sounds really disjointed.
-disgusted-
and my french sucks now... had to rush all the way into the room to check my dictionary to find out how to say 'guilty' in french. this is bad..
-really very disgusted now-
anyways.. was gossiping about the hall people just now with danette... and i realise i do miss hall life quite abit actually.. yep.. and the pple too..
icq-ing yating now...
and eujin's gonna call later..
yippee.. seems like eons since i've last talked to them
=)
it's saturday now...
so.. 26 days to go!
i really don't know which is worse... going to school for lessons everyday and having tons of work to do or being stuck at home with absolutely nothing to do at all during the hols. i'm driving myself crazy!!! all i do nowadays is wake up... use the comp.. eat... sleep.. watch tv... read... go out... talk on the phone... go for a run sometimes... it's so mind numbing and it's hard to believe that exams ended just 8 days ago. it seems like ages since i last touched a pen..
thank god for road race training and the occasional o-team meeting though.. there would be absolutely NOTHING to do otherwise..
had a bout of insomnia last night after my great whining session on the phone with ru.. or maybe it wasn't insomnia. anyway at 2 a.m. i was still tossing and turning around in bed.. getting all hot and cold and alternatively throwing the covers off me and pulling them back over me again. guess i did fall into some sort of restless sleep after that... but somehow i felt really fresh upon opening my eyes at 7a.m. sometimes i really think our body clocks are really powerful... mine knowing that something big would be happening this morning and i was instantly alert at that early hour.
oh wells. anyway. he's gone. have a great trip dear.
27 days to go..
and now i can't help thinking how i could.. on this very day.. be flying to sydney... argh stop thinking.. stop stop stop..
feel really great after a run in the rain! =) started running with the sky dark and it began to drizzle along the way. loved the drizzle... while it lasted but then it started to pour heavily and all the traffic lights turned red the exact moment i reached the junction and tried to cross! argh.. but it was fun while it lasted
went out with the og yesterday. funny... after 3 great months of knowing each other yesterday was the 1st time we actually went out as a group... our 1st planned outing together... haha... but even then.. SOME people weren't around. coffee at citylink... walking to the esplanade... taking lomos with james' camera... popcorn and candy floss... walking down the beach so that mike could look at the scandalous stuff going on... dinner at pasta mania... and finally... highlight of the day... mike's new hairdo! wow he looks great man with his new haircut (at the 10 min $10 place) and his DIY spiked hair (thanks to james) with hair wax from watson's (our xmas prezzie for him!).
heh. anyway... dinner's calling.. off to fill my stomach!